(Disclaimer: this article is based in complete fiction (minus the true existence of the sculpture)
well suited for a fun Friday post! Enjoy!)
Humorously written and submitted by David Tomecek
Fergus Falls, MN—For decades, the residents of this town of approximately 60,000 have been witness to a singularly spectacular otter species, but have kept the knowledge to themselves out of fears of extinction of this special creature. However, travelers to the area have told fantastical stories of the “big otter” of these parts, only to have their tales pushed off as too incredible to believe. Now, researchers have finally cracked the silence and protection of Fergus Falls to reveal the Big Otter, scientifically known as Lontra canadensis humongloidius.
A small study of the Big Otter conducted by the research team found that
its range is limited to the areas surrounding Fergus Falls’ Adams Park. Its
demeanor is typical of its North American River Otter cousins – playful, social
and interactive. Researchers were unable to determine its diet, as the sole
specimen observed chose to make itself available for photographs instead of
searching for food. Other limited data was gathered by the team, but is still
under review.
The research team found that the Big Otter was also a pervasive part of the
town, which is the seat of Otter Tail County. The local high school uses the
otter as its mascot, and many of shops use otter variants in their names.
There’s even local cuisine named for the otter, including the infamous “otter
dog” – a hot dog with chili and cheese inside the casing.
Researchers are asking for additional information from the public to
augment their own observations. If you happen to be in western Minnesota,
traveling along I-94 North, please stop into Fergus Falls and try to spot the
Big Otter. To aid in visual confirmation that you are, in fact, observing Lontra
canadensis humongloidius, the research team has provided photographs.